The one that allows me to back up a trailer.
I don’t talk about my problem with backing up very much here because, well, it’s been a year and I feel like I should be a pro at it by now.
NOT.
My back-up gene seems to be missing? I become anxious and agitated every time I try, so…I don’t practice much, unless I have to. My bad.
If you’ve been around for awhile you may remember last year when I visited my friend Elinor on Bainbridge Island, WA. I made her famous for her narrow, winding driveway through the trees, that eventually leads to a carport that WS would not fit under.
This year we had another plan, to avoid having to have guys come in and back WS down that 1/4 mile road (with ditches too!). Come in on the other end of the driveway, and only have to back up a short distance. Easy, right?
HA.
Easy if you don’t happen to be me with my missing gene. Also it turned out that the driveway was SO not level, and I had to prop the front end up way more than I was comfortable with. Scary.
We had a pleasant few days of visiting, farmers market, playing with all five dogs, shopping in Poulsbo, I washed WS…and yes, Laura and Joel were on the island again this year, so the three of us had a nice relaxed outdoors lunch at Market Place.
Then it was time to leave….Time To Back Out.
Elinor wanted to help of course. People usually do…but after at least half an hour of being directed and getting at a worse angle than ever, I requested that Elinor go in the house and not look. I needed to do it my own way. Go ultra slow, get in and out of the truck about 50 times (no exaggeration here!) cry, fret, breathe, pray, and just work on it.
And guess what? After a total of over an hour later,
I DID IT.
Ask me how. I don’t know. Oh sure, I know you turn the steering wheel the opposite way of normal, OR, put your hand at the bottom of the wheel and turn the normal way. Sorry, for me it’s just not that simple. Maybe it’s because of the anxiety level I feel at the time, that causes me to forget which is right and which is left. Maybe it’s that missing gene.
Whatever.
I’ve gone to large parking lots and worked on it. I’ve been directed by pros who tell me which way to turn the wheel and how far. (That works.) I’ve done it myself when time and traffic are not issues, and I’ve let lots of other people in the drivers seat to do it for me.
The process just doesn’t seem to absorb into my brain. Well, it hasn’t yet.
I’m not giving up!
Wandering Spirit 
Good for you! I totally relate with you on this. When we had a trailer, it took me so, so much longer to back in when someone was “helping”. They were doing the best they could, but my stress went through the roof, and everything seemed infinitely more confusing. I got glimpses of the fact that getting it right was probably a very intuitive, muscle memory-type process. Keep at it, and somewhere in all that practice I think pieces of it will stick.
Hi Karen,
I know exactly what you mean about ‘glimpses of the fact that getting it right was probably a very intuitive, muscle memory type process.’ I agree. I get those glimpses too. They are so fleeting. Need to hold onto them and let them expand!
You are not alone. I could accuse you of plagarizing my story. And I will not give up either.
Phyllis in Oklahoma
Hi Phyllis,
It’s good to know I’m not the only one. Thank you for letting me know!
I empathize. I have a tiny teardrop trailer and backing it was a nightmare. The thing that I finally learned is this: CORRECT THE STEERING WHEEL. By that I mean, the instant the backend of the trailer begins moving in the direction it needs to go, bring the steering wheel back to where the wheels on your truck are straight. It’s turn, correct, turn, correct, very slowly. This results in the backend of the trailer turning in very small increments and prevents odd angles and jack knifing. When I first learned to correct the steering wheel, in order to sooth my anxiety and calm my nerves, I sang “Here comes my 19th nervous breakdown, Turn, Correct, Turn, Correct”. Sing it loud and off key. Fill your truck with happy noise. You’ll soon find yourself laughing, and once the laughing begins, the fear, anxiety, and nerves disintegrate into ‘I can do this’ fun. I sincerely hope this helps you as much as it helped me. I can now back my teardrop without adding to the number of my nervous breakdowns.
Oh Carol! I LOVE this! Being a huge Rolling Stones fan, I will have to try this for sure.
What seems odd is to change the direction as soon as you get it going in the right direction….but I am getting to know what you mean as I think about my experience backing out of Elinors driveway.
I find also that it is good to have a lot of space to maneuver…go forward and backward…which I didn’t have in this situation. And of course, that is not uncommon when trying to back into a campsite.
You are not changing the direction of the trailer. By “correcting” the wheel while you’re in motion, you’re stopping the trailer’s tendency to turn too much. As you know, when the trailer begins going in the direction you want, it will quickly go too far in that direction—-unless you “correct” your truck’s front wheels. The sooner the better. By straightening the truck’s wheels, you stop the trailer’s tendency to turn too much. It’s like a very slow dance that you perform with the steering wheel, a tiny step to the right (or left), a tiny step back. This is something no one ever tells you. They’re too busy telling you how to get the darn trailer to turn which we’ve already learned. Obviously, those people without a faulty backup gene instinctively know to “correct” the tow vehicle’s front wheels. Think about it. The reason we have to pull forward is to straighten our front wheels and stop the trailer’s turning motion. The slow dance with the steering wheel is the same principal without having to pull forward. I promise, once this clicks in your mind, you’ll be the Jumpin’ Jack Flash Backup Queen.
Carol, I think you are onto something here! I mean, I’m sure you know you are, because you are doing it. I do see what you mean and it makes total sense. Maybe soon I too will be able to get some Satisfaction in the back up department! 😊 thank you!
Ditto on the back -up gene (or lack of one…) and give you a ton of credit for perseverance. I keep to my limit of backing out of the garage and agree – – even that is much easier if no one is watching! Pick your battles and that is just not one of them.
Hi Marie,
I know. I have limited skill even at just backing up one vehicle at a time, though I must admit, that skill has improved some since I have to hook up all the time. That back up camera on the truck is a lifesaver.
I keep thinking about getting one to hook up to the back of WS too, but not sure if that might not confuse me even more.
I have great respect for you and of all who write of their adventures – facing challenges with a fantastic attitude AND overcoming them all to go on the next beautiful site and experience. Awesome women all.
micky, i used our walmart parking lot to practice when i first got “sassie cassie”. i use my right hand on the bottom of the steering wheel and talk out loud to myself as i go. “i want the TRAILER to go RIGHT, turn your hand toward RIGHT shoulder” “I want the TRAILER to go LEFT, turn your hand toward LEFT shoulder”. it took awhile, and i still have difficulty at times, especially with others looking, but in general, i back pretty well these days. i would try to avoid a narrow driveway like what you describe. i think anyone would have trouble there.
happy and safe travels, claire and merlin, excellent schnoodle
Hi Claire,
Nice to hear from you! Talking out loud….yes I often do that when I get out of the truck to see where I am. I stand beside the drivers seat and try to think right and left. That ‘right shoulder’ and ‘left shoulder’ is a great idea. Thank you.
Any trailer that has a short distance from hitch to axle is going to be hard to back up. I never did master backing up my Teardrop. I could back it up in a straight line but to back it up on a turn (ie into a RV Park space) was beyond me. In those situations the Teardrops were light enough that I could un-hitch and push the trailer into a space by hand. You can not do that. More power to you and more practice!
Hi Ed. Apparently the shorter trailers are more sensitive to every little turn of the wheel. That’s why Carols comments above make so much sense. Still yes….it takes so much practice, causing that 19th Nervous Breakdown…and 20th…etc.
I can’t give up on learning though because this is my life.
I hope the gene comes alive again and if it doesn’t, you can live with it. I’m glad I don’t have to back a trailer into anywhere on earth! Gip says it’s a piece of cake….I’m directionally challenged … there i no missing Gene….there is NO gene LOL. Love and hugs!
Hi Carmen, yes, Gip having been a truck driver WOULD say that!😀
Is there anything he can tell me that would make it cake for me? Some important thing I’m missing? Besides a gene?